DESCRIPTION: The crew's just chilling.
CHARACTERS: All of class B-5, polymorph
KEY WORDS: Comedy, survival "horror"
EXT. OUTER SPACE
A pod appears floating around in space. As it rotates, the pod reveals a hole on its surface, torn open by force.
SFX: Beep, beep…
NARRATOR: Danger. Do not attempt to open this pod. The creature inside is extremely hostile. It feeds off the human psyche, seeks out the deranged, the unbalanced and the emotionally crippled.
SFX: Beep, beep…
INT. DINING ROOM.
Aries, Quitterie, and Yun-Hua play a game of cards. They are playing Lucky 9, gambling with a collection of shiny pebbles and rocks they found on a previous planet. Aries, with the most pebbles, is the banker. Funicia spectates.
ARIES: Who wants another card?
QUITTERIE: No thanks. My cards are too good for this dang game. I'm gonna beat all of you.
YUN-HUA: Hey-! Isn't it us against Aries...?
QUITTERIE: Oh right, yeah. Whoops.
ARIES: Hm. Quitterie, if you wanna be the banker next round, I'll let you.
QUITTERIE: That's what I've been saying this whole time!
ARIES: Really?
QUITTERIE: OMG, yeah duh! How'd you not hear me?
ARIES: I mean, all your yapping sounds the same to me, tee-hee!
QUITTERIE: (Gasp!) O-M-G! You're so gonna pay for that!
ARIES: Alright! How about a deal? If the two of you beat me this round, you get to be banker.
YUN-HUA: 'Kay
QUITTERIE: What! That is so unfair!
ARIES: Ok! How about you Funi? Join us!
FUNICIA: Ok!
QUITTERIE: Um, let's not teach gambling to a fourth-grader.
ARIES: Aww, it's not like we're playing with real money so it's totally fine!
QUITTERIE: Alright, fine! But I'll add to the deal. (Smirks) If Funi beats all of us, I get to be the banker!
ARIES: (With mild sarcasm, except with her usual enthusiasm) Oh, you're not just getting Funi involved for your own gain, are you?
QUITTERIE: Alright, then Funi and I get to be bankers. How's that?!
ARIES: (Cheerfully) It's a deal! But we have to restart the round because Funi's with us now.
QUITTERIE: NOOO!
INT. KITCHEN
Luca sits on a kitchen counter while Ulgar, gun in hand, stands in front of him. Luca seems enthusiastic. In the background, Kanata does his cleaning duties.
ULGAR: Lesson one.
LUCA: Man, oh man, this is so exciting!
ULGAR: Shut up.
Ulgar holds out his hands as if he's about to clap.
ULGAR: Now hold your hands like that.
Luca holds up his hands.
ULGAR: Now clap.
Luca smiles doubtingly. He claps.
ULGAR: Faster.
Luca claps again, faster.
ULGAR: Now as fast as you can.
Luca hesitates then claps again with extra strength. But, before his hands could meet, Ulgar pulls his gun between them. Luca exclaims with astonishment.
ULGAR: Now you try.
Ulgar puts out his hands and starts clapping at random intervals. Luca stares confusedly.
LUCA: Hey what the hell! I don't know when you go!
Ulgar smirks.
ULGAR: That's just real life.
LUCA: C'mon man, I thought I asked you to teach me to shoot, not play red hands or something.
ULGAR: This is... serious. It's reflexes.
LUCA: Damn, you didn't even have this whole thing planned. Boo!
ULGAR: Reflexes are important!
LUCA: Yeah, whatever! ...Unless, this is just some excuse to spend some nice recreational time with your best friend. That's oddly sweet of you, Ulgar!
Ulgar's face turns slightly red.
ULGAR: Shut up! I'm teaching you to shoot.
LUCA: Then teach me to shoot, man! Where d'you get these lesson ideas from?
Ulgar doesn't say anything.
LUCA: ... So?
ULGAR: ...Ugh. Forget it.
Kanata looks back from wiping the stovetop.
KANATA: No way! Ulgar, you're referencing a cowboy movie!
ULGAR: Shut up.
KANATA: Oh dude! I got some cool old westerns stored in a drive somewhere. We totally gotta watch them sometime!
ULGAR: Shut up!
LUCA: (To Kanata) Yeah, get back to cleaning!
KANATA: BRO! You guys are supposed to be helping us, too! You got time to lean, you got time to clean - now let's go boys!
He continues wiping the counter.
ULGAR: Hmph.
LUCA: "Us"? I thought you were doing everything yourself.
KANATA: Damn it, where's Charce?! Mr Perfect pretty-boy better not be checking out his reflection or somethin'
Charce carries a pile of dishes over to the sink.
CHARCE: What?
KANATA: Oh good! Thanks so much for the help!
INT. DINING ROOM
Aries, Qitterie, Yun-hua and Funicia continue playing Lucky 9.
ARIES: Uh-oh you guys~ My cards are looking kinda good!
QUITTERIE: I got crap cards... Gimme another card please!
YUN-HUA: Ohh... I would like another card too, please.
Aries tosses Yun-Hua and Quitterie a card each. Quitterie squints in disappointment. So does Yun-Hua.
FUNICIA: I'm happy with mine!
QUITTERIE: Are you sure you know what you're doing?
FUNICIA: Yup! I've seen you guys play so I'm sure I know enough
ARIES: Ok! Three, two, one, REVEAL!
Everyone tosses her cards on the table. Quitterie and Yun-Hua more shamefully than the rest.
QUITTERIE: Seven.
YUN-HUA: Ten...
ARIES: Six!
QUITTERIE: Hold on, did you say six? WHAAAAT!!!
ARIES: HA-AH-AH-Ah-AH-AH-AH-AH!!!
Quitterie shakes Yun-hua's shoulder with defeat and desparation.
QUITTERIE: GIIIRRRLLL! We cou'dve beaten Aries if you didn't ask for that other card!
YUN-HUA: Oh, I'm sorry! She just looked so confident, I wasn't so sure if I should've gambled or not...
ARIES: This is a bluffing game, silly!
YUN-HUA: Aw...
QUITTERIE: Funi! How about you?
FUNICIA: Mine add up to twelve.
We see Quitterie on the floor, defeated. She sighs massively.
QUITTERIE: ...Yun-Hua, this is all your fault, so as a consequense, you gotta tell us a secret!
YUN-HUA: U-uh...
Quitterie sits up.
QUITTERIE: I'll make it easier for you! How about... Tell us something totally embarrassing you did when you were 13.
YUN-HUA: Oh gosh...
Aries, Quitterie, and even Funicia smile at Yun-Hua eagerly.
YUN-HUA: Oh… Ok…! Um…
She pauses for a moment. Suddenly…
YUN-HUA: Oh, I need to go to the bathroom…!
ARIES: Aww, what?
QUITTERIE: Nice excuse, girl! C’mon, let us hear it!
YUN-HUA: No, I’m serious!
QUITTERIE: You’re trying to avoid answering, aren’t you?
YUN-HUA: I promise, I’m not trying to avoid anything! I’ll be right back.
ARIES: Really?
YUN-HIA: No, really!
QUITTERIE: Okay~
YUN-HUA: Besides…! I can’t think of anything right now, but maybe when I come back I’ll give you something good. Really! Okay?
QUITTERIE: Hah… Whatever you say. We’ll be waiting!
INT. CORIDOOR.
Zack, walks down the hallway. He notices Kanata. Over to Kanata, we see him dust off his pants.
KANATA: Whew! That was fun! (pause) Huh? Hey Zack!
ZACK: Kanata, I need to talk to you in private.
KANATA: ‘K!
INT. ZACK'S ROOM
Zack leads Kanata inside.
KANATA: So! Wussup?
ZACK: There appears to be a non-human life form aboard this ship.
KANATA: What?
ZACK: Our ship has been invaded by an alien.
KANATA: I know that but… What does it mean?
ZACK: I don’t know. However, it could be hostile so we must be alert.
KANATA: Alright! I’ll keep my eyes peeled from now on!
ZACK: Good. And so will I!
KANATA: We gotta let the others know. At a good time. When d’you think?
ZACK: Hm… Let’s see… In ten minutes from now, it should be-
A quiet, tense conversation can be heard from another room alerts Kanata and Zack.
??? (from another room): So you didn’t know I even came on this trip?
YUN-HUA (from another room): I’m s-sorry! I didn’t mean–
??? : Enough. I don’t want to hear another measly excuse from you.
KANATA: What n’ the… Someone’s talking down Yun-Hua…!
ZACK: But who?
YUN-HUA: (To ???) Oh… I’m really sorry!
KANATA: He doesn’t sound like anyone here. How…?
ZACK: I don’t know… Unless…
???: (to Yun-Hua) Stop apologising. Is this really how guilty you feel?
YUN-HUA: Y-yes…
ZACK: That is the alien…!
???: (To Yun-Hua) Just how guilty do you feel?
KANATA: Then we have to hurry! Let’s go!
YUN-HUA: (To ???) Awfully, awfully guilty…!
Kanata and Zack run in the direction of Yun-Hua’s voice.
???: (To Yun-Hua) INDEED, YOU DO!
Cut to: Kanata and Zack arrive at the scene. Yun Hua lies unconscious on the floor.
TO BE CONTINUED...
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